Filipino Television

You know, I used to think channel surfing was fun. Back then, there was always the option of flipping away with the remote whenever nothing was on. Not anymore. Today, every time I accidentally land on a Filipino program, a few million of my brain cells commit suicide.

What is with Filipino television? If it's not some game show wherein the game itself requires both the contestants and the audience to act like complete idiots, it's another shampoo commercial. I swear to God if I see another girl who has impossibly smooth and shiny hair, laughing and flipping her hair around like nobody's business, I'm going to go postal. It's just shampoo, dipshit. Get over it. And don't get me started on those fucked up game shows. It's like every few words or so, people suddenly break out in dance. "And now, for the question and answer round!" Dance number. "Who is the current president of the Philippines?" Dance number. "Errr..." "Whoops! I'm sorry, your time is up. You just lost the chance to win 2 million pesos. But cheer up! We have dancing girls!" Dance number. Holy crap on a stick. And as if that wasn't bad enough, the game shows make the contestants play moronic games that the producers pulled out of their collective asses, usually with a couple of subtle, snide comments from the hosts disguised as jokes.

Some people may attest that the game shows are actually kind of helpful, as they give away much-needed cash prizes to contestants who are desperately in need. In fact, some may say that they even contribute to the community. Some people need a bitch-slap from reality. Those bastards earn a heck of a lot more than what they give away, and they are laughing and slapping each other on the back all the way to the bank. As for contributing to the community? Well, judging on how most of the populace already heavily depends on "get-rich-quick" gimmicks such as the lotto or gambling to get a better lease on life, I'd say it's pretty safe to say that they're just fueling another one of the factors that contribute to the overall decline of of the Filipino quality of life. Still not convinced? Wait, I feel a cough coming on. *cough cough* stampede *cough*

For those of you who were wondering, yes, I am aware that game shows and brain-hemorrhage inducing shampoo commercials aren't the only things that comprise Filipino TV. Oh no. "Telenovelas", the Moby Dick among the bunch, is also on my list. Why didn't I just do that rant along with the game shows and the comemrcials? Shitwaffles, that subject matter is so huge that it deserves an entire rant of it's own.